How to Save a Marriage or Relationship From Catastrophe...

It has been said that marriages are about love, while divorces are about money.   Like many statements, this is one with elements of truth in it. It misses many parts of the bigger picture, however, as there is often heartbreak, tears, misery, screaming, anger, the husband blaming the wife, the wife blame the husband and both parties blaming themselves involved as well.  It can be a turbulent moment in anyone's life, where questions of identity and persona arise on a daily basis. It can be hard, during a time like this, to keep practical considerations such as finance and money at the forefront of your mind.  It's really important that you do exactly that however, as the decisions and choices you make during the next couple of months could end up effecting the next few decades of your life.  It's imperative that you keep your head clear during the proceedings, even though that is far easier said than done.  Here are some ways to make that impossible task seem a bit more

Many people ask the question of what amount of time is appropriate to wait before someone moves on after a divorce.   This is a pretty loaded query, due to the emotions involved.  Many people seem to judge their own post-divorce progress based on how quickly they move on to a new relationship, and no small number get caught in the trap of trying to be the to move on first.  This often leads into a series of choices made for the point of some unspoken competition, instead out of actual personal development.  The end result is years of bad decisions made out of desperation, and the best case scenario is you looking up and realizing that you lost your imaginary contest years ago. Most therapists, doctors, and psychological experts agree that after a divorce , people should wait at least a year before serious dating.  Keep in mind that these are the same sort of experts who still can't tell us if chicken eggs are good or bad for human beings, so take that with a grain of salt.  The

What roles men and woman play in life has changed drastically within only a few generations.  Many women are choosing independent, agency filled lives.  Some attribute dropping marriages rates with the fact that many women aren't socially forced into marriage, by virtue of being unable to gain sustainable income for their household without a man.  Things have changed so much that many women have begun to question the institution of marriage in its entirety. While all of this can be fascinating and engaging material, it can be a dreadful pile of nonsense for the recently divorced woman trying to make sense of her life.  While the options afforded to the American woman are greater than they've ever been in most places, certain cultural hang-ups can be hard to shake.  You may feel like mourning your marriage makes you sound like a spineless shill while, at the same time, having gone through a divorce can also make it feel like you are somehow a failure to your gender.  All the

The Kübler-Ross model of grief was made as a clinician's tool for understanding the process of how people dealt with the imminent death of a themselves or a loved one..  Since its introduction in 1969, its scope has been widened to deal with just about any tragically poignant transition in a person's life.  As a divorce can feel like the death of a marriage, this psychological model has been applied to these circumstances. While not always the case, Doctor Kübler-Ross found that depression was most commonly one of the last stages in the process of grieving.  It can also be the easiest one to get stuck within, as depression occurs when another person is in such grief over what has happened that they feel they have little agency in changing their life for the better.  What's worse, they don't see a reason why they should want to change anything, as they're not sure how life can get better in light of what they lost. The first thing to realize is that depression