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Showing posts from November 12, 2017

Heartbreak 101

Finding fulfillment after heartbreak can seem difficult. What should you keep in mind to survive your relationship breakdown? 1. You are not delusional. Many times after a breakup, women second guess themselves – and begin to think that they were not actually in love, or that it wasn’t true love to begin with. Just because the relationship ended does not negate the reality of your feelings. 2. Don’t play the “What If?” game. Don’t spend time wondering about what could happen (“Will he find someone else? Will his new partner be prettier/smarter/a better cook than me?”) Trying to imagine what will happen only prolongs your heartache, and is not helping you to recover. Spend your time focusing on moving past the relationship. 3. Release the anger. Anger is an important part of the stages of grief. You need to feel anger – it helps you to move beyond the relationship. Don’t hold on to the anger for too long. Sometimes anger becomes a habit and is causing more harm than good. Feel...

The Post-Divorce Dating Game

The idea of starting to date after a divorce is enough to make a grown woman break out in hives. A divorce is a traumatic event and will take time to not only recover but to decide that you are ready for a new relationship. Especially if you are coming out of a long marriage, it can be overwhelming to consider going on a date with someone new. How can you survive the new world of dating after your divorce is final? 1. Are you ready to start dating? Just because you are divorced, you don’t have to jump right back into dating. Give yourself time to move through the stages of grief before even considering entering the dating world. When you have reached the point of forgiveness for your ex, then you will know you are on the road to recovery. Once the idea of dating doesn’t make you want to run and hide, then you are more than likely ready to start dating. 2. It’s ok to be afraid. Someone once said that courage isn’t the absence of fear – it’s the knowing you’re afraid and doing som...

Setting Healthy Boundaries

Every relationship is a series of give and take – sometimes you give more, sometimes you take more. A healthy relationship moves back and forth between the two areas, with ease and understanding. When a relationship is in its beginning stages, it is important to set healthy boundaries to ensure the success of the relationship. If boundaries are not set, either one or the other of the members of the relationship may begin to feel imposed upon, and will be unhappy in the relationship. This leads to breakup and discontent. Boundaries are both physical and emotional. Physical boundaries include the ideas of who can touch us, and how they can touch us. A random stranger in the grocery store has a different set of boundaries than your mom, for example. If your mom hugged you, you probably wouldn’t react with shock or discomfort. Physical boundaries are important to help you feel physically safe and comfortable. Emotional boundaries are equally as important. Boundaries in your emotion...

Date Nights: More Than a Fun Night Out

Couples throughout time and the world recall the one date when everything clicked. In the story of their relationship, this date is they share with family and friends. The pinnacle date proves unique, but it links to every other date like a string of pearls connecting their history and future. Looking at date nights, couples could discount their importance, not see their benefits or be fresh out of ideas. More Than Optional Talk to anyone in relationship about the point when things became stale and they indicate the loss of romance, fun, commitment or perhaps all three. If asked at the beginning, the wild passion would have blinded them to a bland future because people rarely plan for the slow decline of anything, much less a relationship. Everyone, even the most stoic, needs these energizing aspects in their relationship. People want to feel valued, heard and considered. The lack of these things cause people to seek it elsewhere. How Can a Date Night Help? The act of setting ...

Indicators of Exit Strategies

Everyone believes they possess keen insight into their partner's moods and thoughts. Unfortunately, people rarely have an accurate assessment of everything the other person in their life is saying. This is why it is important to pay attention. Tiny items add up and possibly point to a plan the partner might be unaware they have. All Is Quiet: Everyone seeks time of solitude and silence. Random moments of quiet is not an obvious concern. When this becomes a pattern of behavior, red flags should be raised. A good course of action in the face of this is small engagements of non threatening topics. If they refuse to talk about these items, a pending demise to the relationship presents as a possibility. Going It Alone: Someone making plans to leave a relationship will begin making decisions on their own. They usually start with small things like a new piece of clothing or accessory. If asked about it, they might attribute it to liking it and wanting to get it. These small decisio...

Relationship Reintroduction

Every relationship begins rife with potential for the heights of pleasure and pain. What happens when the couple has witnessed those rolling peaks and valleys? Coming back into a relationship, especially after its demise, cause people to be wary. While caution shows wisdom, cutting off any future with a previous partner might be an unnecessary surrender. So, what are some some signs demonstrating the relationship potential of the person returning? Checking these items might give a indication whether to reestablishing with one another. Reopening Communications Everyone receives messages from an old partner from time to time. It might be a random phone call or text or message on social media. Depending on what happened, the natural reaction might be to delete it and ignore the contact. The original relationshipo and its end brings the greatest evidence of how to proceed following the contact. Was it toxic? Did they cheat? Were they immature? Any of these would be a good reason to po...

Top Romantic Meals

Food shows love in the most unique way. A meal can transport a person to the time when they felt safe and warm. Taking time to prepare something for a loved one requires time, planing and patience. Going on this journey with a partner opens the relationship with opportunities for growth and sharing. What to Make? Considering the options available, people receiving a homemade, romantic meal almost never find the gesture empty. The only wrong answers revolve around personal tastes, dietary restrictions and lifestyle choices. For some, a huge slab of beef cooked over an open fire is the pinnacle of care. But a practicing vegetarian would view the offering as an affront. A key is to be aware of a partner's preferences and tastes. Simple and Challenging Options Chicken: A versatile ingredient with a long history of accepting a variety of cooking styles and sauces while pairing with several side dishes. Simple: Roasted Leg Quarter-A well seasoned quarter roasted in the oven ...