I'm certainly not saying that you shouldn't even try or that it is impossible, but I am saying that if you find yourself in a situation where you need to rebuild the trust you once had, it is usually even doubly difficult to do the second time around.
If you have made a mistake and betrayed your partner and you decide that you want to put things back together and make things right, just know that you must be willing to commit to it fully. Rebuilding won't be quick or easy but it can be worth it.
We are only human and sometimes we make mistakes that is the reality. But, when those mistake cause someone else, particularly the person we love, a lot of pain, it just makes it more important than ever to try to make things right.
Here are a few things that may help you rebuild the trust you and your partner had before:
1. I think one of the most important things you need to do is allow it time. You must be patient and understand that there is no time frame. It's not uncommon for the partner who messed up to say they are willing to give things all the time it needs, but then if things don't start getting better in the time frame they would like they get angry.
They can sometimes accuse the other of "holding them hostage" or just "hanging on to the anger to punish them" things like that. And while it's not impossible that that is the case, in most instances it just takes time to regain trust and this impatience and anger on the part of the partner who made the mistake is possibly a sign of some deep level selfishness which could well be the reason they broke their partners trust in the first place.
Just be willing to allow your partner as much time as they need. If you can't do that you may just be better off walking away.
2. A good way to build trust with your partner is to not lie. Tell them the truth. Even small white lies are still lies, just don't do it.
3. Good communication skills will make your partner feel like they really know what is going on with you and over time that can lead to an increase in trust. Be willing to open up to them and let them in. You may find that you never really have let them in in the past. Again, that could have been the problem you had to begin with.
All of these things are important elements to a healthy relationship but they are especially crucial if either of you needs to rebuild something that you've lost.
Good luck in your efforts to building trust in a relationship once lost, it won't be easy but if you are wiling it can be done.
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