Problems can rear their ugly heads at any time during a relationship and sometimes can cause such stress and strife that you just have no clue as to how to handle them. These are the times when a counselor can be helpful. Instead of thinking that the relationship is over it is best to get another opinion and try to save the marriage.
Once the issues are out in the open, your therapist will ask more marriage counseling questions like, "Which issue do you think you need to start working on first to help save the marriage?" The two of you may have different issues that you deem most important and the counselor may suggest that they see the two of you separately for a time and then bring you both together for couples counseling.
When the two of you are brought together to talk to each other you will be monitored closely by the therapist and will be required to follow some ground rules. The therapist will tell you to try hard not to play the blame game. This may be difficult to do especially if the biggest issue you have as a couple is some form of infidelity.
Most marriages do not survive infidelity. More power to you if you think you can forgive and forget and work though it. Coming out the other side better for the experience is very difficult to accomplish and I have just one thing to say. Good luck, you will need it.
You may ask your therapist if they think that the marriage can be saved. They will be able to give you a better answer to that question once they get to know you and your spouse and the severity of the problems between you. If you are willing to do the work, anything is possible.
Your counselor will help you wade through all the clutter that has built up over time and get right down to the nitty gritty of what is really the issue causing all the trouble in your relationship. This is important because if there are long-standing problems then you may not even know or remember what started it all and there can be a lot of confusion about the real reason there is trouble.
Sometimes asking tough marriage counseling questions is the only way to get down to the root cause of the trouble in your marriage and also the only way to repair a broken relationship. So be prepared to take a good long look at yourself and your spouse and your relationship.
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