Before you even think about mentioning your desire to call it quits, you have to be 100% sure it's what you want to do, and know why you want to do it. This is important, because once you mention the subject of splitting up, there is no logical way to unmention it.
Key #1: Tell the truth - You may feel that you don't owe your partner anything, but as a fellow human being, they deserve the truth. If you are ending the relationship because you have done something wrong, now is the time to say so. While telling a few lies may make breaking up seem easier, in the long run it will always come back to haunt you.
Key #2: Be calm, respectful and direct - If there's one thing you can be sure of, it's that emotions will be running high as soon as you bring up the subject. Keep in mind that the proverbial ball is in your court. This means it is up to you to set the tone. Remain calm, respectful and direct to make things go more smoothly, but...
Key #3: Expect the unexpected - You may picture your significant other getting mad and burning up all of your clothes on the front lawn, or you may envision them sitting motionless, stone-faced and distant. Whatever you imagine, I can guarantee one thing, it will not go the way you think it will. That's why it is so important to know your plan and stick to it.
Key #4: Watch out for manipulation - There is always a chance that your soon-to-be ex will do everything they can to get you to stay. Being manipulated into sticking around will only breed resentment. On the other hand, they may raise an honest point you may not have previously considered. Just be extra careful when trying to determine what's really going on. To be fair, be sure you aren't the one doing the manipulating.
Key #5: No living in the past - This key is last because it's the most difficult. While you'll want to explain why you want to break up, don't bring up past faults that will lead to an argument. You both already know what you don't like about each other, no need to bring it up now. If you absolutely must bring it up to explain why you're leaving, do your best to stick to the facts of the behavior and not to personal attacks.
Ending a relationship gracefully is never an easy task. Adding insult to injury is never classy. It takes planning and careful implementation to end it gracefully, but it's the best way to handle things - for all parties involved. Don't forget your copy of "Magic Of Making Up" below!
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