If you've been apart from the person you love and you plan on
getting back together after a long time, the first thing you should do is slow down. I know that's probably the opposite of what you want to do when you're ready to
get back together. But even if they are ready to do so as much as you are, take a careful look at your situation.
Depending on how long a period of time you've been apart, many things about each of you could have changed. You could be different people in many ways. And while this is not necessarily a bad thing, you do need to be aware of it.
During that long time, have you been with other people? Have they been with other people? How do you each feel about things you've done when you were apart?
If you're unsure, it's important to have a conversation about it. You don't want to
get back together after a long time only to find that you're unhappy with the things that have happened between your breakup and now. They might assume you've been hanging around for them and not seeing anyone else. And you might assume the same too.
While talking about other relationships might seem like a bad idea, it's better to do so before you get back together and to have a surprise after-wards. And remember, it's not always a bad thing. Being with other people could have shown you in a different light why they want to be back with you.
You also need to think about why you broke up in the first place. If it was something that one of you did, has there been forgiveness for that? Or are there still resentments one or both of you haven't been able to let go?
It would be terrible to
get back together after such a long time only to find that one person or the other, or even both, is hanging onto a past hurt. Try to work those out before you make another commitment. That can help you keep this commitment much stronger and longer lasting.
If you're trying to convince the other person to
get back together with you after a long time and they're not really on board, you can try wooing them in the same way you did in the beginning. Or if they wooed you, you can make it clear that you want them to try again.
There's no guarantee that they'll come around and want to
get back together with you. But if you do everything possible to make it clear to them you want to, if there's any part of them that wants to, then it could happen.
When you're
getting back together after a long time, you have an opportunity that other broken up couples don't. In many ways you can get a fresh start. Especially if you have very much time apart you can get to know each other all over again. Date just like you don't know each other, and try to do everything right from the very beginning.
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