It doesn't matter if you've been in a
relationship for a while or if it's brand new, most people will reach a point where they are considering taking their relationship to the next level. The next level could mean anything from physical intimacy to a walk down the aisle. No matter what the next level is for you, now is the time to start evaluating your relationship with your partner.
While it may seem like this would be an easy thing to do it can actually be very difficult. There are a few reasons why achieving an honest evaluation can be a tough thing for people:
1) If you wait too long to honestly access the quality and strength of your
relationship you may already be in too deep to be able to objectively analyze the weak points in your partner and your relationship.
Once you've fallen for that person you will see only what you want to see. Few people will still have the strength to honestly admit that there might be a problem. They will turn a blind eye and pretend that everything is great.
2) During the early days and most of the 'dating phase' of a
relationship your partner, and you, can be very guarded and careful of what they let the other see. With some people it's a deliberate attempt to hide their true colors with others it's a more innocent "putting the best foot forward" type of thing.
Either way this tendency can make an honest evaluation very difficult.
One of the most important things you can do to try to have a secure and fulfilling
relationship is to honestly evaluate the strength of your partner and the
relationship early on.
It's also important to take your time. Too many people ignore the warning signs because they just want to be with someone so badly they are willing to be mistreated just so they don't have to be alone.
If you really want a strong
relationship make sure you are strong first. If you are happy with you and you have made a full life for yourself filled with people and activities that make you happy, then you won't be so desperate for a relationship that you allow yourself to be mistreated.
Honestly evaluating your
relationship with your partner is something everyone should do, but few actually do. The earlier you do it the easier it will be to see things clearly as they really are and not just as you want them to be. That is the difference between a happy and loving
relationship and an unhappy and potentially abusive
relationship.
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