Loss of Meaning:
Relationships require support beyond simple things like pleasure or companionship. Shallower items may prop up a failing couple early in the run. Unfortunately, the weight of longer relationships require sturdier supports.
Doesn't Mean Anything Anymore: When one no longer feels valued in the relationship, they will wonder what the point of continuing is. This often sounds quite dramatic, but everyone needs to feel valued. The lack of mean eats away at the relationship slowly like a lemon left face down on a marble counter top with its slow destruction to the porous stone.
Don't Have Trust: Like meaning, the erosion of trust can be subtle at first. The trust bank requires replenishment constantly. The small investments shore up the relationship when times become hard. With exhausted trust, the relationship ends in strangulation of hurt feelings and sideways glances.
Lack of Future:
Relationships require room to grow. Couples hitting the highest levels of growth, commitment and connection may find they have no where else to go. This stagnant pool breeds mistrust. In this state, either person may feel suffocated and wonder where things are going.
History Versus Vision: A longing for better times in the past means someone is drinking from the well of nostalgia hoping things might return to the way they were. Without forward momentum, couples cease growing. A good history can contribute to a good foundation. Hanging all hope on the past proves to be a millstone dragging the relationship underwater.
All the Effort: If one person does all the work, they might want to consider just how much the relationship means to their partner. This can be a tricky thing to determine. Any discussion with a partner will likely lead to a disagreement since everyone usually thinks they are doing all they can to hold up their end of things. Careful consideration must be exercised to determine if someone is doing all they can within the relationship.
One of the strongest indicators of relational health is emotional pain. This can be difficult to quantify as there are not good measurements for pain. Medical professionals have a scale of one to ten. Often, matters of the heart can feel like a ten when a couple goes through them, but the intensity can lessen with the passage of time.
Being Alone is Better: Making the choice to be on one's own rather than with a partner points to the location of a person's heart. It might be a situation where peace is found in the stillness. An important thing to remember centers around the individual's natural style of interaction. Introverts might prefer to be alone even in the best relationship. Being aware is critical.
Hurts to Be with Them: A sensation of pain from a dull sense of dread to a stabbing pain in the chest can be physical signs of an emotional pain. Expressions of emotional pain, especially very intense ones, prove difficult for most people to share. Many suffer in silence. A few lash out in response to the pain. Ultimately, these are not the correct responses.
Deep reasons run throughout relationships giving clear indications as to the overall health of the pairing. By being alert and responding appropriately, the relationship can end with a minimal amount of damage to either person. Loss of meaning, lack of a future and ongoing emotional pain lead to the right decision no matter how difficult it might be. Be smart, release the pain and move forward toward a healthy future.
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