Skip to main content

M & M: Money and Marriage

Contrary to popular belief, love of money is not the root of all evil, lack of money is. This issue is a major concern of most married couples today.  Believe it or not, eighty percent of divorces are the result of disagreements over money.  Though money and marriage may not be good topics to talk about together, the fact is -- marriages cannot go on without money; while money, fortunately or unfortunately, can very well exist on its own. 

The following are tips to improve marriage especially when money and finances are involved.
Learn each other’s spending styles

A couple is composed of two individuals with varying likes, dislikes and preferences, with differing financial lifestyles – e.g., one is a big spender while the other is a spendthrift; one is an impulsive buyer while the other likes to think things through; one prefers to deal with money matters now while the other wants to think about it over night.  These differences could cause friction and fights if the disparity is not appropriately resolved. 

It is best if a couple finds positive and creative ways to use each other’s unique styles to serve the interest of the marriage as well as their bank accounts.  Different does not have to mean conflict and a clash of methods in saving and spending.

Differences are varying ways of approaching problems and opportunities to solve these problems and using these opportunities to the best advantage.  

Spend on values

Couples must take the time and effort to get to know the values they would like to prioritize.  Values such as financial stability, companionship, freedom from debt, etc. are a few examples.  Partners should define these values and determine which are most valuable to them. 

Sharing details about each other’s financial capabilities and in-capabilities is essential.

It is important that couples mutually agree on what it is they want to focus on and from there decide how best to serve each other’s emotional wants and financial needs.

Have dates, will discuss

Money matters during dates used to be a no-no.  But now, discussing money issues during dates is a practical and wise decision.  It is a “no-frills” way to maintain honesty and transparency.  Conflicts may or may not be avoided during these discussions. The important thing is that disagreements must not in any way be the dominant factor in your relationship. 

Talk about sharing financial responsibilities.  Decide how much you must spend and on “what, which and how”. This could be a great way to settle differences, if there are any, and could even improve a couple’s relationship, especially after each has found out how open the other would be in handling finances.

Divide and conquer

Partners must distribute financial responsibilities to each other.  Their decisions should be based more on one another’s capabilities, means and interests than on outdated stereotypes based on gender.  A man was to bring “home the bacon” and the woman was to stay in the house to take care of the children. This scenario may or may not work in this day and age unless a couple finds this particular style actually is best for them.  What is important is that a couple’s uniqueness shines through and the financial lifestyle they decide on works best to their family’s advantage.

Share any events, especially financial ones with each other as well as make sure that important decisions are discussed and mutually agreed upon with the best interest of each other in mind.

Plan it then spend it

There are couples who plan what they spend i.e. budget. There are also couples who spend and then plan later.  The former is preferred over the latter.  Although it could feel a bit restraining, the value of planning ahead enables couples to know what they need more than what they want.  Planning also enhances a couple’s creativity as it forces them to think of innovative and often better ways to cover expenses that they have.  Planning also increases the chance of saving and decreases their spending.  This ensures their long-term enjoyment in their financial future.

Money and marriage should not be a source of conflict unless couples make it that.  All it takes is honesty, openness and genuine respect for each other’s capabilities to make money and marriage work.  And if couples wish it so, it will be. 

Want to Save Your Marriage or Relationship with the Person Your Dating? Grab Your Copy of "The Magic of Making Up" Today.
Click here now!


Popular posts from this blog

Wife Abandonment Syndrome | When Thе husband Says He's Leaving You

Ten Hallmarks оf Wife Abandonment Syndrome 1. Prior tо thе separation, thе husband hаd ѕееmеd tо bе аn attentive, engaged spouse, looked uроn bу hіѕ wife аѕ honest аnd trustworthy. 2. Thе husband hаd nеvеr іndісаtеd thаt hе wаѕ unhappy іn thе marriage оr thinking оf leaving, аnd thе wife believed hеrѕеlf tо bе іn а secure relationship. 3. Bу thе time hе reveals hіѕ feelings tо hіѕ wife, thе еnd оf thе marriage іѕ аlrеаdу а fait accompli аnd thе husband moves оut quickly. 4. Thе husband typically blurts оut thе news thаt thе marriage іѕ оvеr "out-of-the-blue" іn thе middle оf а mundane domestic conversation. 5. Reasons gіvеn fоr hіѕ decision аrе nonsensical, exaggerated, trivial оr fraudulent. 6. Thе husband

Figure оut whаt hіѕ wife isn't dоіng right. Men nееd tо feel masculine. Mоѕt lіkеlу thе wife hаѕ emasculated hіm оvеr time, аnd thеrеfоrе hе іѕ nо longer attracted tо her. Thеrе аrе а lot оf articles аnd books оn whаt thіѕ means. Dо уоur homework tо find оut hоw tо mа…

Sharing is Loving, Loving is sharing - Your Hopes, Fears and Dreams

Talking is one way to share thoughts and feelings between partners.  Research has shown that women actually talk more than men,  in fact about three times more in terms of the number of words.

This fact does not excuse men to from not talk.  It is the men who “clam up” and refuse to talk.  There are also cases where men who do more talking   than women, just as there are cases where it is the women who talk a lot  as well as those women who do not wish to talk a lot.  There is actually no clear cut or fool proof way to judge who should do more of the talking or who should do less.  It is primarily not about gender but about the individual themselves.

Communication is a vital part of any relationship.  Openness and honesty is a key ingredient to maintaining a kind of memorable relationship that is mutually loving and emotionally comfortable.

The following are tips and possible activities one can do to get yourself or your partner to talk his/her heart out, and share voluntarily any fear…

Three Areas Pointing to the End of a Relationship

Every couple longs for eternity. Unfortunately, forever challenges all couples regardless of how they started, what they have survived and the best of intentions. Being able to spot when things are coming off the rails in a relationship will allow everyone to assess what needs to be done to salvage it and if they wish to invest the time.

Area One: Communication

Communication is held up as the best barometer for telling the status of a relationship. Part of this stems from how pervasive an aspect of the whole relationship communication turns out to be. So how can a couple tell if trouble is brewing in the arena of communication?

All Is Quiet: Long, uncomfortable silences charged with tension define the time spent together. This may occur because one of the pair feels no desire to expend the energy to engage in healthy communication.

Swimming in the Shallow End: When discussions happen, the topics remain light or non threatening. Short and unemotional answers replace detailed explanations …