Saturday, May 8, 2010

What Does Your Bible Say About Marriage?

If you are wondering what does the Bible say about marriage, it really depends on which book you read. Obviously the views of the Old Testament are rather stricter than those expressed in the New Testament. You need to be careful when looking to the Bible for answers. Sure use it as guidance but the contents need to be interpreted in the light of the times those people lived in. Not all of the information contained in this book is relevant to the issues and crisis that can affect marriages today.

For example, the "What God has joined together let no man separate" teaching is wonderful if you are in a successful marriage and both of you are happy. But I don't believe God would want any woman to stay with an abusive husband or vice versa. And while I believe that marriage is for life, there are always exceptions to the rule. Unfortunately in our society today, the number of marriages breaking down is on the increase. This could be for a number of reasons, not least of which is that divorce is more socially acceptable these days. It could also be the fact that people often enter into marriage contracts without putting enough thought into whether the other person is the right match for them. Just look at any number of celebrities, some of whom appear to believe that a Wedding chapel should be fitted with revolving doors.

It is very easy to walk away when your marriage hits a bad spot and sadly that is the mistake a lot of people make. But the fact is that every relationship will hit the rocks on occasion. What is important is what you do to put it back on the happy track. Men and women are so different that it can lead to communication issues. Then you add in life hassles such as worries over children, money, mortgages, jobs etc and it is easy to see why romance may go a little cold.

But before you head for the divorce lawyer, why not invest a little money into some education. Buy the Magic of Making Up and see if you can apply these theories to your own situation. So many people will separate from their partner and end up living a life of misery on their own. Or they move onto the next marriage and then the next etc. If you once loved your partner, you can rekindle this lost love and it really doesn't take a huge effort. In fact it usually takes less time and energy than trying to find someone else to love and learning how to handle their faults. Better stick to the devil you know and usually love on some level!

So pay less attention to wondering what does the Bible say about marriage and start concentrating on getting those romantic feelings back into your own. You will be very glad you did.

Religion has a way of turning things upside down in today's society we must be careful how we interpret it. Saying "I Do" the words may sound good at the beginning of the wedding, but can both men and women be committed to it, something to think about. For more detailed information on the "Magic of Making Up" book by  TW-"Dub" Jackson

Friday, May 7, 2010

I Think My Marriage Is In Trouble

If you are asking yourself the question is my marriage in trouble then it could appear that the answer is yes but this doesn't mean that it is. It might not be in grave danger of heading to the divorce courts but you are obviously not happy in the relationship if you are thinking this way. This maybe because there are issues between yourself and your partner or it may just be your perception of how things are. You could be feeling unfulfilled and lonely.

Whatever the reason for your feelings you need to get to the bottom of them or your marriage will be affected. It is not possible to have a happy relationship when one or both partners are feeling isolated, unloved or confused. It is not your partner's responsibility to solve your problems, emotional or otherwise for you, but it does help when they are supportive and understanding.

You may be feeling down because your diet is lacking in certain vitamins and minerals. For example, women of childbearing age need plenty of Vitamin B in their diets as otherwise their hormones can cause them problems. They can suffer from restless sleeping as well as mood swings and depression. Often you don't get sufficient vitamin B from natural resources so you may need a course of vitamin tablets to get you back on an even keel. Speak to your doctor if you are finding it difficult to sleep, are tired all the time or having difficulty shedding excess weight. You may have an underlying medical condition such as a thyroid problem and so need medical treatment. Men can be affected too.

Your worries may highlight a problem in your relationship. Have you tried talking to your partner about your feelings? It is not the easiest thing to do but once you take the first step you may find that you start to feel better. Communication is not a skill we learn in school or college. It is one of those things that people just assume we learn as we are growing up. Some people are natural communicators but most of us struggle to put our feelings into words particularly when talking to the person who means more to us than anyone else.

In the book The Magic Of Making Up, the writer discusses the problems that communication issues between couples cause. Most marriages end due to bad communication rather than an affair or abuse. And the really sad bit is that a significant number of break ups could have been avoided if one or both partners asked for help.

So don't sit and wallow in your feelings. Talk to your partner today. Find some quiet time together and tell them how you are feeling and ask them how they feel about things and take it from there. You may find a little bit of good communication and some time together will help to resolve your worries and you will no longer be asking is my marriage in trouble.

Lighten Up Do A Marriage Quiz Today...But Beware It Might Open Old Wounds!

If you want some light entertainment one evening why not do a marriage quiz together? These tests are designed to be a bit of fun but sometimes they can be used for other purposes. Some people will use them to sort out the problems in their relationship which is rather unrealistic unless both of you have taken a truth drug. For example, if you are both in a loving mood then you will score highly on these tests as you will both be open to the suggestions that your partner is wonderful. However if he is less than Romeo in your eyes or she resembles your mother in law more than the wife you married, you can get all the wrong results. For example, they can be used to check compatibility, although one could argue that it is a bit late checking that when you are already married!

So you have been warned, what can start as a game can quickly turn into an argument if you have underlying issues already. So if you two have been fighting a lot lately perhaps this is not the type of fun you should engage in. But that being said, they can be a useful way to open up a discussion particularly if you find it difficult to talk about your problems. You may find that the quiz opens up some doors to better communication between you. If you want to start talking about a difficult topic you might want to introduce a quiz as an idea for an activity that both of you can do together when the kids have gone to bed. Just be careful as these things can spiral out of control very quickly if either partner takes offence easily.

Where can you find these marriage quizzes? They regularly appear in magazines and are also available online. But if you are having problems in your relationship this is the not the way to resolve them. You need to get some help whether you try a relationship counseling service or some self help books and courses. If you are not sure where to start you could try the Magic Of Making Up which helps to develop proper communication between spouses and partners. Sometimes it can seem like men and women are from two different planets. They often want the same things but are not sure how to put this into words.

Every couple have days where they argue constantly and appear to have lost all love for one another. It is only when these days outnumber the good ones that you need to be concerned. A marriage quiz is meant as a bit of fun and we all need some fun and light entertainment in our lives particularly if we are going through stressful times. One of the best ways of keeping your relationship alive is to laugh together. Try renting an old funny movie or doing a quiz. Whatever works for you.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Should You Go to A Marriage Seminars - Are They Worth It

Marriage seminars are becoming very popular with a variety of people and you may have thought about attending one yourself. In certain parts of the world you cannot have a church wedding without first attending a marriage seminar. The idea is that by going to one of these courses, the couple get a chance to explore the various issues that they may face during married life. The person leading the seminar will show them how to explore their different responses and how best to communicate with each other.

Do these courses work? That is actually hard to quantify as it is difficult to measure the success rate. If a couple attends a relationship seminar and decides not to get married you don't keep any statistics on them. If after attending the seminar they go ahead and get married and perhaps divorce in five years time, the statistics are already; jacked up so to speak. Some couples do benefit but some just attend as it is mandatory and they won't be allowed have their big day in the Church without having a certificate to prove they were there.

The other form of marriage seminar is the one organized for those that are already married. These seminars run all over the country. There are a variety available. For example, you can attend a Christian seminar or one designed for another religion. Some seminars have no religious bias at all. The idea is to give couples an open platform in a neutral setting to discuss issues that may be preventing them from connecting properly. Do these types of courses work? Well yes for some people but it really depends on what type of couple you are and what your problems are. If you are very private and don't like discussing issues in front of other people you are unlikely to find that this type of event will help you.

You would probably benefit from one to one marriage counseling instead. What can work for everyone is some education into how relationships work and how to fix those that are not working properly. A great book for anyone to read and implement is the Magic of Making Up. As the title suggests it is aimed at those who are having problems and want to resolve them. If you have a read of the testimonials you will see how many people credit it with giving them back their happy relationships. Even if you haven't reached the point of breakup you can benefit from reading and applying the knowledge that you learn from books like these.

We can all benefit from better communication skills. It is just a pity that it takes a crisis or thoughts of a marriage seminar for us to realize that we need help and soon. Don't take your relationship for granted. It needs care and attention in order to flourish. But when it does you will be so much happier.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Can Marriage Restoration Work

Are you wondering if marriage restoration works? Yes it does if you know exactly what to do and when. Love is like a plant - you need to nurture your love or it will die. You need to feed it on a regular basis and let it build in strength. A well nourished relationship is very hard to destroy.

If you need some ideas on how marriage restoration works make sure you read every inch of this blog "How to Save Your Marriage or Relationship from Catastrophe". The strategies here will help most people to improve their relationships and not just those of us facing a marriage breakdown. Communication between couples can be plagued with problems. Our egos often get in the way and if not our egos, our pride. How often have you known that you should apologize for your behavior but decided that you couldn't do it as you didn't want to lose face. Some men let their egos go to their head. They lose a fantastic relationship with the woman of their dreams because some other girl looks attractive and shows interest. He can't let his ego down by saying no, his unfaithfulness, gets caught and then wonders why he may need marriage restoration.

When you are part of a couple, life is not always easy. You have to compromise and this can mean that you spend your Saturday on the sidelines at a game when you would rather be in the Mall shopping. Or it could mean you take your wife and her parents out to dinner when you would rather be with your buddies in a bar somewhere. But the benefits of being happily married far outweigh any disadvantages. Being able to come home to your loving partner at the end of a hard day. Knowing that there is always someone who believes in you and what you are trying to achieve. Knowing you are not on your own and don't have to spend your life in a series of flings because you are lonely.

If you have children, you owe them the chance of growing up in a happy home with both their parents. They didn't ask to come into your life, you invited them. All kids want Mom and Dad to stay together. Sometimes it is best for parents to split up but only if they have tried everything to make their relationship work first. They can't just bail out at the first sign of trouble. All couples go through phases of being less than happy with each other, but for the majority these phases will pass especially if you both make an effort to resolve the underlying issues.

Yes being happily married takes hard work and commitment but the benefits are fantastic. So if you feel marriage restoration would work for you today, read this blog and follow the instructions and get your relationship back on the right track now. Don't wait until it is too late.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Marriage Requirements 101 Can You Cut the Grade?

It is amazing how many people will search for marriage requirements to see if they can legally get married or perhaps to see if they can have a Church wedding. Yes these same people may not give the same time and thought to whether the person they are marrying is the right one for them. It is so easy to get caught up in the romance of the occasion and to forget that while your wedding day is a big event, it is the start of something so much bigger.

Getting married is a commitment and should be treated as such. More people give longer thought to taking out a joint mortgage than to getting married. This could be due to the fact that divorce is relatively inexpensive, unless you have a complicated estate or are very wealthy, and it is also socially acceptable in most circles. The fact that celebrities marry and divorce at will certainly doesn't help.

The sad fact is though that most people do not walk away from a broken marriage without incurring pain and scarring. It is difficult to see all your dreams of happiness with another person die. And it is worse when you remember that a significant number of people who divorce, regret it. They don't regret getting married, they regret getting divorced!

So what can you do to prevent landing in a similar situation? The first step is to be realistic in your expectations. While it is fantastic to have your husband or wife as your best friend, they cannot supply you with everything you need. You have to be a happy individual in your own right or you will make both of you miserable. You need to be independent even though you are part of a couple. You need to show your partner love, respect and loyalty while still giving them and expecting them to give you the freedom to have a life of your own. Your partner should know that they can go out with their friends and have a good time without getting the third degree on their return. Your relationship will be much more successful if everyone involved has room to develop and breathe. And if you do have kids be careful to still make your relationship a priority as one day they will grow up and leave home and you don't want to be left with a stranger for company.

You need to do things as a couple and spend quality time together. Nurture your love and show appreciation for each other. Surprise your partner with a small romantic gesture every now and then and not just on the obvious occasions like their birthday, Valentines day or your wedding anniversary. Ask TW-"Dub" Jackson he will give you more ideas on how to prevent your marriage or relationship from joining the depressing list of the divorce statistics. So stop worrying about marriage requirements and concentrate instead of being sure that you two are made to last the distance.

Who ever said marriage isn't rocket science was a fool. Marriage takes effort, time, growth, respect, patients and directed communication from both partners...get it wrong, that's when the problems start.